This is how to give direct messaging. Hello everyone, my name is Samuel Balaoro and welcome to the BE Mindset, a place for future leaders and personal development. If you’re new here, follow us on Instagram for updates on new events happening in The BE Mindset community. We are in part two of Relationship Building Month. In this part, we will talk about the second part of communication, which is direct messaging.

Why Direct Messaging?


Why Direct Messaging?

  Have you recorded yourself talking before? When you talk, is your conversation straight to the point, or going all over the place? Do people even understand you when you are talking? Learning how to speak directly will get your message straight. Direct messaging will allow people to see what you are talking about.

What is Direct Messaging?


What is Direct Messaging?

  When I say direct messaging I don’t mean Instagram or Facebook. Direct messaging is the idea to speak clearly and straight to the point. With direct messaging, you will speak with authority. People will understand what you are saying. Nothing is hidden in your message, making it transparent with others.

How to Give Direct Messaging

Direct messaging means direct eye contact.


1. Direct messaging means direct eye contact.

  I brought this up in the last article. If we want to have a real connection with the people we’re talking to, then we need to have great eye contact. If you are not even looking at the ones you are talking to, then they might think what you have to say isn’t important. You won’t even look confident when you are trying to speak. Having proper eye contact can help show where you are in your conversation.

  Now we already talked about how to show great eye contact in the last article, so if you haven’t yet you can check it out here. But what I want to add on quickly is head leveling. Yes, even how you position your head will show meaning to other people. Raising your chin a bit can make you seem a little overconfident while lowering your chin might be a little seductive. There is a time to have these certain postures and in another time we can go deep into rapport, but for now, just remember to have an even level view between you and the person you are talking to. Rapport is basically having a harmonious relationship.

Direct messaging should have your message first.


2. Direct messaging should have your message first.

  These next two on our list will go more with the actual conversation. The first being that our message that we want to address should come first before our story or explanation. If you find yourself telling a story before you get to the point, then most likely people lose interest in you. I probably learned this from my uncle. He was in the army and always wanted a direct answer.

  If you want a good example of this that’s not as strict as the military, then look no further than Kevin Hart. Most of his jokes start off with him telling his message first, then saying the story after. This doesn’t only go to him, but to most comedians as well. People laugh because they can either relate to the story or understand because they know the message first. This doesn’t mean you have to be a comedian, although being funny is a plus, but it does allow you to show your message first.

Listen to the sound of your voice.


3. Listen to the sound of your voice.

  Giving a direct message doesn’t only come with when you are giving it, but how you are giving it too. It all depends on where you are set. Maybe you have to speak to a large congregation. For this case, you’re speaking one on one with individuals. The tone and speed you are speaking your message will affect how you will say it.

  This can be a topic on its own. So, for now, we will go through the basics. It’s best to record yourself to see what you have to work on. What lacks in most people’s conversation is the power in the message.

  This doesn’t mean just being loud or speaking really slow. Depending on what you are talking about, you can be quieter at times. However, I do not suggest speaking fast. To speak directly you need to have a moderate speed with a balanced tone using your natural pitch. It’s even better to speak in rapport with who you are talking to because it makes the connection even better, but once again we’ll go over rapport in another article.

Try using slight touch and hand movements.


4. Try using slight touch and hand movements.

  Lastly, I will be talking about touch and hand movements. You can use touch to grab attention to the one you want to talk to. Having hand movements while you talk can also add emphasis to your message. These things give you more freedom to express yourself as you are speaking. You just need to know how to use it moderately.

  What do I mean as in moderately? For example, when it comes to touch you have to make sure that you don’t come off too strong or creepy. A touch on the shoulder is fine as well as a pat on the back. Touching the hand is more sensitive, so proceed with caution.

  The same goes for hand movements. You don’t want to keep your hands closed up because you’ll seem nervous. Just letting it dangle is not good either because it’ll look and feel awkward. Generally, you want to move your hands around where it’s comfortable and not waving all over the place. You want to record yourself doing this so you will know what felt and looked right to you.

Something to Remember


Something to Remember

  Just like listening, speaking also means having an emotional connection. The difference is that we are giving our emotions instead of receiving them. Being said that, there should be a level of passion for saying what you want others to know. If there’s a little passion, then no one will listen. However, showing too much passion will make it harder for others to accept. Calm your heart to give your message with clarity and authority.

CONCLUSION


Conclusion

  Thank you for joining us today. Now if you do know how to give your message directly but don’t know how to tell your story, then click here where I talk about telling your own story. Why do you have a hard time giving your message? Comment it in the comment section below. Like this and don’t forget to follow us on Instagram for more updates. This is The BE Mindset and always remember to be alive, be happy, be free, be you.

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